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I'm terrified

8:30It's a long story. Nick had been pissed at me today (long story). He got mad when I turned on the tv just now...throwing shit everywhere

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So nick was upset tonight because his friend owes him money, and the guy's girl stole a xm radio. I shouldn't have asked him to turn down the tv when I was trying to fall asleep (it set him off). He turned off the tv, then went to add wood to the fire, and slammed the door so hard the glass shattered...then got pissed about that and started kicking the wood stove...then throwing things. By that time Jenna had woken up. While holding her, he stormed in her closet fetching his ak47 (frightening both of us). The he fired some rounds, I think to calm down. Quite frankly-I'm afraid.

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Unhappy birthday to me

So I turned 25! Nick was sweet enough to take off work for my special day. Although he wasn't sweet enough to plan anything special. Unless you count spending half the day in town getting me a gift..but how long does it really take to pick out just a card?

Am I not worth it? Guess now. I need to learn to buck and cheer the fuck up.

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"Love ...
we think about it,
dream about it
lose sleep worrying about it.
When we don't have it,
we search for it;
when we discover it,
we fear losing it.
It is the constant source of pleasure and pain.
But we can't predict which it will be from one moment to the next.
It is a short word,
easy to spell,
difficult to define,
impossible to live without..."

Welcome back self

Wow, I have been inactive from this site for over a year! My friend Jamie tried to get me to find my password by helping me find my username and all...it didn’t help. Last Thursday I looked over on Nate’s computer screen to find that he had an account on this site. I finally got enough sense to run a lost password to find it (bing!). I never seen what the hype was all about. I still think myspace is better because not only do you get to make entries, but you get to design a profile (and have photos larger than 100X100). Well, I guess I shall try to give this site a little bit more credit - - - so I will explore it some more.

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November 2011


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